Jim Rice Has Lost It

Well, this should keep him out of the Hall of Fame for good (it's a subscription site, so here are the juiciest parts):

"You have to learn how to stay (in the majors)," he said. "What do I have to do? If I've got to cheat, I got to cheat. I don't care. I want to be in the big leagues."

That comment drew a loud moan from the crowd, and Rice quickly responded.

"I'm not talking about steroids or anything like that," he said. "It's like this here. This is what I mean by cheating in baseball. Men, I don't know about women because you guys are pretty and can always find a boyfriend. Anyway, men, if you're fighting and this kid is taking your lunch money every day, are you going to cheat? Yeah, I'm going to bring my baseball bat in the next day. That's cheating. So it's the same thing with baseball."

Rice tried to explain himself again, saying if a hitter always has success against a certain pitcher, that pitcher will start using pine tar on the ball or putting water on his pants in order to soak the ball.

"It's not cheating," he said. "It's having an advantage. I'm not going to be happy sitting in Triple-A 4, 5, 6 or 7 years when I know in my heart I'm better than that guy in the big leagues, and he's cheating and I'm not can't do it. You've got to find some way of getting yourself in the big leagues."

He talked about mastering a pitch or learning how to hit. He ended his rant by telling the players there are only a couple of things they need to know.

"There are two things they should always remember," he said. "The first and the 15th, because that's when they get paid; you have to remember that."

I don't even know where to begin. First, he says it's okay to cheat, then he offends women, then he says that the same cheating that he just advocated isn't really cheating, then he essentially says "just get paid." He started off innocently enough, too, talking about working hard in spring training and how some players take their talent for granted, and then it just disintegrated. Good lord.